Bereavement, grief, loss - Tips

There is not a right or wrong way to grieve. Grieving the loss of someone or something is a personal process. It doesn't have a standard time limit.

Maybe you feel like staying in bed all day. Or maybe you want to escape the feeling of loss by keeping yourself occupied with work or other activities.

Try to find a balance between on the one hand keeping in contact with the outside world and on the other hand to make time to mourn your loss and express your grief.

The death of a child is for you as a parent one of the most profound, painful and difficult experiences that can happen in your life. It is so intense, that often the people that surround you also do not know how to deal with it. This can increase the sadness.

On worldwide candle lighting day, every second Sunday in December, people light a candle in remembrance of children that have died. That way, we as friends, try to console and give attention to the immense loss.

Realize that 'mourning and moving' can go together. You will feel sad, give it time and space, and at the same time move on. Go on with your life, take care of yourself, do things you like to do, make (new) plans, visit friends, etc.

Ask yourself what the loved one you lost would want you to do. How would he or she want you to continue living your life and focus on that.

Are your experiencing bereavement, grief and loss and could you use some support?
A therapist or counsellor can help you.

When scary things happen that we can't control it is easy to spiral down a path of despair, despondence or divided-ness.
A way to steer a different path is to focus on what we do have control over - our day-to-day actions.

Kermit the frog - who embodied the value of kindness and brought joy to millions of children - began life with the purpose of entertaining just one individual. Jim Henson's grandfather was dying and Jim wanted to bring lightness and humour while the family was sitting vigil . Jim used his mother's old coat and a ping pong ball (cut in half for the eyes) to create the puppet.

This story reminds us that creative, simple, loving effort to bring care and joy to one person always has the capacity to spread.
We can stop our minds wandering down the path of fear by focusing on what's in front of us.